In today's fast-paced world, it's easy to lose touch with ourselves and the ones we love. That's why we're thrilled to introduce you to Charlotte Ruth Wilson, a somatic practitioner who specialises in exploring the connection between love and self-intimacy. In this blog, we'll dive into Charlotte's unique approach and gain insights on how to cultivate deeper connections with ourselves and others. Get ready to embark on a journey of self-discovery and learn how to nourish your relationships with love and intimacy.
1: Charlotte, tell us about your journey.. You are an expat living in Sri Lanka? Sounds exciting -
what inspired the move? What is life like living and working in Sri Lanka?
Hi I'm Charlotte! I live in Sri Lanka and I'm originally from London. My heritage is Jamaican
and I was born and brought up in the UK. So, I actually moved from London to the Maldives
and then on to Sri Lanka and we've been here for about 11 years now. I used to teach in schools and so an opportunity came up in the Maldives and then I was there for about a year and a half, it was a place I totally loved, I loved my job but then I ended up moving to Sri Lanka which isn't far away from the Maldives but culturally very, very different. So yes, I've been here for 11 years now and my son who was 5 when we left the UK, has lived most of his life in Sri Lanka. I love Sri Lanka, the country itself is amazing in terms of the nature, I love living here. All places have there challenges and the country has been through a lot but it's one of these places where the people always bounce back and come back really strong. I would also say that as a Black person from England, a lot of people aren't used to that kind of thing when you're abroad. I don't see it as a challenge because I love being a Black person but I do find that I go through phases of having to explain where I'm from, and people make assumptions about that. Like, I'll go through phases where no one asks me, and then I'll have times when people ask me all the time, multiple times a day, like, 'Are you from here?', 'Are you from
there?' and they don't often realise that there are Black British people, like people will say
things like 'So do you have a UK passport'! Which is quite interesting! I have my own Coaching Practice and I work online and in person and currently we are extending what we offer in terms of Relationships and Love which is exciting. I think because my perspective is so different, people really enjoy working with me over here. I'm non judgemental and believe in people expressing themselves creatively and so people love that. They see my energy as inspiring so I've been told. When I work with people, they always go deeper into discovering themselves in a way that's actually fun.
2: You are a Somatic Practitioner! What exactly is this? Tell us about this work and how you got
started in this field?
So the first time I really started to understand how movement can really tap in and heal the
body and emotions was many years ago when I did a course in Drama Therapy. I remember
coming out of the place we were working in glowing, as if my essence had in some way been
nourished and put back on line! I am also a qualified Drama Teacher and saw the ways that Drama changed the emotional state of the children I was working with in schools and really always just wanted to offer that to adults, particularly women, who were out in the 'real world' secretly dealing with problems but putting a brave face on things. Probably, in many ways at the time, that's how I felt in myself to some extent. Somatic really just means relating to the body, and for me, in the work that I do, we focus in on the body and emotions and how these are actually interlinked. We use Movement, Art, Drama Techniques and a whole range of methods to deeply connect with ourselves more intimately. I'm also trained in a technique called Focalizing, a Trauma Informed, Body Based approach, where we 'drop in' to the body. We're all walking around in our bodies but quite often are actually disconnected from them and see them as functional, we're not really taught to 'talk' to our bodies or check in. So this is a huge part of the work that I do. It's become quite 'on trend' to talk about Trauma and 'how it keeps the score'. Now, for me personally, I'm quite focused on the 'Energy that Creates'
and is pleasure-filled and Joyful because we're actually blessed to be here on the earth and I
think so often this is overlooked by people. I say that as someone who will sit and hold a tree!
You can actually feel them talking to you, it's a different type of language really. People often
take so much of themselves fore granted, we have this gorgeous, beautiful life and it's all
quite simple really. What I saw when I taught Drama was that when people tap into their emotions and use movement and allow their emotions to move through their bodies, it can change their state
and they can actually process their emotions. I started to create my own methods around embodied practices and that also includes movement and Art and using Art with the body. I also have a method where people actually embody relationship patterns as well so what you can see there is when you embody the relationship pattern of your partner, you're seeing things from different perspective and you tend not to blame as much, it gives you a deeper understanding of why people behave in the ways they do and how there's kind of like a dance between the two aspects involved, so you see your part of that dance and you see how you fit into everything. It's almost like you take responsibility for your own actions within that partnership and you also see their behaviour from a completely different perspective too.
3: As a creative and artist - where/what do you draw on for inspiration? What do you do in order
to allow for deep original creativity? Where have you lived or traveled to that really inspired you
on a creative level?
I draw on myself for inspiration mainly. Much of my work has a personal focus, including Self-
Portraiture. In doing so, I'm able to centre myself as the focus of my own life, which is something that I've learnt is very. beneficial for people who may have been conditioned to centre others as 'above' them or make others needs more important than their own and perhaps think that this is a way of perceiving that comes naturally to them. Often people don't realise they do this as it's been moulded into them but their thoughts and emotions tell them something doesn't feel right. Art gives us the space to get still and examine, to be with ourselves. It can also be a phenomenal teacher. The process of creating can teach us that there is no such thing as 'perfection' for example. This doesn't mean not to have standards and aspirations but we realise 'perfectionism' is something very different. I am also inspired by relationships, love and intimate partnerships and the feelings these aspect evoke. This inspires my writing (including my song writing) as well as visual Art. Living and working in the Maldives inspired me creatively, in terms of how people actually look visually because you can see such a rich mix of different cultures in people's faces. It's very beautiful. I remember being in the Maldives and seeing guys with big afros. It made me happy, it actually made me feel like it was easy to fit in. And I always felt really accepted there. I know not everyone feels that way, but I definitely did. It's a time where things felt very simple but I suppose everyone feels like that when they look back at the past to some extent! Sri Lanka was and is a very different experience for me. I did not feel that instant acceptance that I did the moment I landed in the Maldives but it's funny because I've lived here for ages now and it has influenced me massively. One of my paintings is of a 'Malu Man'
who used to come round and sell fish, and I took a photo of him. I actually printed a copy out for
him and he said it was the only photo he had of himself. I love being here and I love the land
itself. Being here has had its challenges don't get me wrong, but I'm happy with the person I
am today so I tend to focus on that. I'm also influenced by Classical Mythology. I always have been really and in many ways I love the feeling that I have Art and not have to be in a world that's constructed by outside forces and I can create my own little vortex of new creation and new ways of seeing.
4: What are your top tips for aspiring female expats & entrepreneurs looking to live and work
I personally didn't really plan or think about it too much which might sound odd to some people, particularly as I had a 5 year old at the time but that was the way it was for me. I suppose I'd always known I wanted to experience something different and had always had a bit of a love/hate (maybe hate is too strong a word) relationship with London because part of me always felt like I needed to escape. I had an interview online and a few weeks later, we headed out to the Maldives. I would say, I
was very, very lucky because my Mum put all my stuff in storage for me and sorted out so
much which enabled me to just pick up and go. It was something that totally changed the trajectory of my life and quite honestly, if I'd thought too much about it from a 'logical' perspective, I might not have done it. But I'm someone who tends to see everything as an adventure, I was especially like that back in the day. I remember when Dylan was little and we'd used to just go out and do normal things, and I'd say to him 'We're going on an adventure', so I suppose it was just an extension of that!
My advice would be LIVE LIFE.
Yes, consider finances and that sort of thing, it's probably best to have something lined up
before you go, but LIVE YOUR LIFE. We live in an amazing world and there truly is so much to see and experience. We're very, very lucky.
LIVE YOUR LIFE and be open to explore. It's not the same as being on holiday but I also believe now that we have a lot of power to create the type of life we want. You might just learn something about yourself, other people and this beautiful planet. And that can never be taken away from you.
5: What challenges have you faced along your journey? How did you overcome them?
The biggest challenge I faced was waking up one morning unable to move my left hand side. This answer should really come with a trigger warning I suppose. When it happened, I remember screaming for Dylan and he was amazing. At the time he must have been only about 11 or 12. I told him I couldn't move and of course I was panicking. He said to me, 'Don't worry Mummy, that happens to me sometimes too' and he put on 'Poirot' for me to watch because I've spent most of my life watching Agatha Christy adaptations. I actually tried to get out of bed after having a glass of water he brought me from the kitchen that I'd asked him for. I ended up flopping down and breaking the glass that broke in my hand. So not only was I there on the floor, their was a blood bath too! I don't normally even think about this so it's a bit emotional really. Now when I look back I am in awe of how I've been able to heal and how I now climb up ropes and lift heavy weights. I remember sitting on that floor and saying to Dylan that I don't understand why it happened, that I'd started painting again and was feeling better in myself, he said something I'll never forget which was, 'Mummy, maybe this is
part of it', and of course it was and as I write this, I'm crying to be honest. I'm so lucky to have
him and I'm so lucky to have my life.
6: What is Charlotte Ruth Coaching? What can people expect with coaching sessions from you?
What do you offer that is unique from other coaching programs?
I really work with people on relationships, most importantly the relationship that they have
with themselves. I use creative methods in my coaching and it is very much about deeply loving yourself and redirecting your energy. We then focus on external relationships that you have in your life, including your relationship with money. I also work with other coaches to develop their own programs with an intimacy and relationship focus. Whenever I work with people, in either capacity, people see their own power and start to really access it, so I'm very grateful for the work that I do.
I also run programs and retreats with a creativity focus, particularly Art and Writing. What
many people don't realise is there's often a link between the energy of creating and the relationships we have in life, including our intimacy with ourselves.
7: You have a membership - ‘Get Ready to Write in 2023’! Tell us what people can expect
from this membership.
Yes! It's very exciting! I help people write their book in my 'Ready to Write' Membership
Program. We do so many fantastic processes to help people tap into their own power and
creativity. I've had brilliant practitioners come in to do EFT tapping and Spoon Bending,
which might not sound relevant but it's all about directing energy and recognising that you
can let go and be in flow, creating from that space. Everyone also has 1:1 calls with me, where we do a range of things, including writing directly on the call so that you actually see results! So, it's both fun and you see solid results. People who work with me become much more confident in the lives as well as creatively, so it's pretty amazing really!
8: What are your top tips for creative writers who feel blocked or lost?
There are very different reasons for 'blockages' or feeling lost so I would always have to speak
to someone personally first before giving specific advice. I've seen people who have amazing
stories who want to write but are resistant in some way, because the experience was so
overwhelming. Often people also judge themselves even before beginning and I often see people thinking they have to write something 'perfect'. My advice is, free yourself up as much as possible, move your body in ways you don't normally move, allow it to feel experimental and get massive, big sheets of paper and a marker pen and just start to write anything down that comes to you. Play, enjoy, feel and then you'll have no time to judge.
9: How do you cultivate a work/life balance?
I'm very lucky as I have an extremely supportive family and Dylan is 18 now, so is very independent. I've never really thought of anything like a work/life balance because I've always just got on with my passions and have never really thought of them as 'work' and to be honest, it is actually a pleasure to be a mother, I've always felt that way. I absolutely love having a child and have always enjoyed looking after him. It was a lot of fun when he was younger because he was fun and loving and kind. We had fun together, he's my greatest blessing.
10: What is the future for you Charlotte? Where do you see yourself living and working in the
I'm deepening into my own Art and Singing and so what to focus on the journey of my own
creativity as well as helping other people focus on theirs in my Coaching Practice. I see my
Coaching becoming more and more successful and I'd love to get married to the one who
knows I'm the love of his life, and knows I feel the same about him! I'd honestly love to have
another child too. My health is truly important to me, so I see myself as being healthy in
body, mind and spirit!
I love Sri Lanka and I also see myself being in Europe more frequently!
I see a bright and beautiful future for myself and all my family members. Joy, abundance and passion are three words that come to mind!
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